The Flyz's Blog

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Long distance relationship

They say true love never forgets
They say true love survives time and distance
They say true love never dies

They also say out of sight, out of mind
They also say long distance relationship never work
They also say there's no such thing as true love

Can someone really fall in love and remain in love with someone you barely seen? You depend on the phone and the internet to communicate each other, you talked and chatted with each other almost everyday, and yet the last time you see them was ages ago.

Technologies are very convenient when you want to communicate with someone from long distance. You're jumping happily when you see them online on MSN, you're hopping with glee when you receive their SMS. Their voice is just but a few buttons away on you phone. But what happens when the internet's down? What happens when they're not within reach of the convenience of the internet? What happens when the telecommunication netwok screwed up?

Without the presence of the interpersonal touch of a normal relationship, communication becomes vague, there's no body language involved, you can't see the true feelings of the other person at the end of the line. You can hear their voice, but you can never know what they're thinking.

Is something wrong?
Why is she so cold today?
Why didn't she pick up the phone?
Why didn't she reply my SMS?

A thousand and one questions played in your head. In a normal relationship, you know seeing them is just but mere days away in the coming weekend, or maybe just mere few hours away when you're going to meet them later. You know you can discuss the problems when you meet.

In long distance relationship, you know the next time you'll be seeing them in far away, you don't even know when's the exact date you'll be meeting them, or whether you'll be meeting them at all.

The nagging feeling thinking when's the next time you'll seeing them again, the sinking feeling in the heart when you think of them, the times when you really needed someone to hold, someone to love, and yet they're out of reach.

Before this, I was: Sleeping
Currently listening to: Babyface - Everytime I close My Eyes
Currently feeling: Sad, emo, worry

Sunday, December 25, 2005

Merry Christmas

It was a Merry Christmas indeed...

I mean, how merrier can it be than being stuck in a bloody traffic jam counting down to Christmas together with the radio DJ and accompanied with car horns. Did I mention alone?

I was in 1 Utama as usual every weekend for the last several weeks, I never had any plans for tonight, David's out of town, Nelsen's out of shape and the rest pretty much got plans of their own. I'm hanging around with Omar after the promo ended, found some of his friends at Chili's and chill out awhile. Called Agnes to wish her Merry Christmas, and she told me that she's in KL for a party and invited me over, noting that the time wasn't even 10.30pm yet, I decided to make a move to KL, thinking there should be more than enough time to get there before 12. But then again, KL traffic killed my plans and I ended up in KL at almost 12.30, counting down my Christmas in the car, in the jam...

She and her friends wanted to get a drink but almost none of them are familiar with KL nor PJ, so after some discussions and arguments, we decided to go back to Kepong. Since I've no problem with driving to anywhere, I agreed. So yeah...

Me tipsy 'hic'

Before this, I was: taking a bath
Currently listening to: Beatles - I wanna Hold Your Hand
Currently feeling: Sleepy, happy, merry, blur, tipsy, whee...

Saturday, December 24, 2005

Subang to KLIA - Pushing the limits

I drove all the way from Subang to KLIA in under 30 minutes!
"Big Deal!" You might say
"I can't do it in 15 minutes!" You might say

But did I mentioned that my petrol warning indication light was on all the way?

David was flying off back to Terengganu for Christmasearlier this evening, I'm not sure what time is the flight, but he's supposed to check-into the terminal by 7 something and I supposed to pick him up by 6. But due to the slight rain earlier, the traffic along LDP was in a massive jam and I only managed to get to david's place by 6.45.

When I left my house, there's still 1 notch from empty and I estimated that to be more than enough to go all the way to KLIA. But due to the constant go-stop in the jam, the petrol dwindled to slightly above the empty notch, due to the lack of time, I ignored the petrol level and drove all the way to KLIA, pushing the petrol level to the very limit.

After dropping off David, I re-filled at the Petronas on the way out from KLIA, the RM 50 fill-up didn't even reach the second notch, normally a RM 50 fill-up will have the meter touching the top notch. Pretty much tells me that the petrol tank is already used up to the minimum, probably will go 'poof' within the next few kilometres.

Anyone have any idea how far a Wira 1.5 Auto can go with a full tank? 'm not even quite sure how much a full tank really is, I've filled a RM 53 full tank, and at one time it touched RM 60 to be full, what's the actual capacity of the tank?

After dropping off David, I picked up Nick, Jerry and Philip to go see Nelsen in Gleneagles Intan Hospital, that fella is down for an operation on his knee for to a torn ligament, due to 'overuse' of the muscle. Stupid sport jock... Anyway, it took us ages to get there, almost 2 hours stuck in the car due to a bloody jam in along Jalan Pudu and Jalan Imbi, luckily Jalan Sultan Ismail is free and it took us less than 10 minutes to reach the hospital from there.

When we reach there, Angie and Fabian already reached, Komathi was supposed to be there with them too, but couldn't make it. We just hang out at his 'suite' for almost an hour and left for food, because Philip, Nick and me almost fainted from hunger. So all 6 of us packed into my car and went to Jalan Alor for food, since most of us are new-comer to that area, we ended up at a stupid stall that sells stupid, expensive and yuck food. Then again, I think everything there is stupid, expensive and yuck, maybe except the famous chicken wings, which I forgot where the stall is.

I agreed to send Angie home because I'm a very kind-hearted person that hates to leave a girl to take a cab home in the middle of the night all by herself. Really, I am... Anyway, Angie stayed in this bloody-far-god-forsaken place in Taman Cuepacs in Cheras, which wasn't actually really far in from the mainroad, but it definitely is god-forsaken lar, looks abit like Puchong when it's first developed, the whole place empty, no shops, no mamak, no traffic. After that, I send Fabian home because I'm a good person and hate to dump him in Subang. He stays in Kota Kemuning, somewhere near Sri Muda in Shah Alam, bloody far in another god-forsaken place. Stupid Indian... (Fabian: Portugese!)

Oh! I'm no longer unemployed! Went for an interview at a company in USJ today, does sealants and tapes (The sticky type). I applied for the post of management trainee and I got the job immediately, maybe they're really impressed by my good-natured personality and the gung-ho-hardworking look, or maybe because the boss who interviewed me already knew me because my dad is one of his client. Shit...

Nonetheless, at least I'm no longer unemployed come next year. I'm to start work at the 3rd of January, with a salary of RM 1*00. No extra allowances and benefits, means it'll be even lower than when I'm working at the previous company. But then again, beggars can't be choosers, at least I'm earning more than what I'm getting right now. I'm likely to continue this promotion job of mine, it'll only last until end of January anyway. I think I can still survive one month without weekends, at least I'll have more money for the Chinese New Year at the end of Jnuary.

Before this, I was: reading Suanie (I won blog of the year!)
Currently listening to: Penny Tai - Chen Yang (How?)
Currently feeling: Happy, tired, sleepy, blur

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

It's been quite some time...

It's been quite some time...

...since I posted anything worthwhile in here. Nothing meaningful, nothing deep, nothing special. I seem to have lost the inspiration that drives me to blog almost everyday last time, the inspiration to write record down my thoughs and feelings of the day, the inspiration to question certain things in life. I seem to have lost the passion for writing, the passion to record down everything that happened that day.

It's been quite some time...

...since I did anything worthy. I've been extremely busy lately, at the promotion every weekend, working at the shop almost everyday. But it somehow seems like everything I did for the last few months isn't worthy at all, the satisfaction is not there, the fun is not there, even the pay wasn't really visible at all. I've resumed actively seeking for job already, newspapers and websites. The replies aren't really coming in, or maybe not yet. Maybe...

It's been quite some time...

...since I enjoy my life. My life revolves around work recently, works that doesn't really pay much. I can't remember the last time I enjoyed myself, not the recent Langkawi trip, not mamak sessions, not even the weekly gaming session with the guys. Computer games isn't as fun anymore, reading wasn't as captivating anymore, even the prospect of a relationship doesn't excites me. I get bored at everything easily nowadays, I get angry at everything easily nowadays, I get emo-ed over everything nowadays.

It's been quite some time...

...since I went shopping. I like to buy things, but I can't afford anything at all right now, not even for Christmas. There's alot of things I want to buy, I want a new cap, I want, no wait... I need a new motherboard for the computer, I want new books, I want new casettes. There are tons of things I want, but I can't... This is not a fucking Christmas wish list, those are things I wanted to buy for ages already, but can never afford them. The old company still owes me my allowances for the races, Joe still owes me, I still owe david, I still owe my mom.

There are too many things that's going downhill for me recently, nothing is interesting, nothing is worthy, nothing is worthy, everything is nothing. Sometimes I wonder if I'm living my life correctly? I've managed to change once, I'm sure I can do it again this time. I've been through worst, alot worst. I've pulled through, pulled myself out of the slump, I did it before, or else I'd probably be in prison, or dead by now if I didn't pulled myself through the last time.

There are too many things in life for me to achieve, I can't give up now. I've to work hard, alot harder than I've ever did to achieve those things. Maybe I should set a goal for myself like Joe did, maybe I should just let life takes it course and go where ever it takes me. Maybe I should just end it right here...

Sad to say, I used to believe in suicides, I used to believe deaths solves alot of things, I used to believe that pain can relieve pain. I believe in them no more, I've seen more problems created with death than it solves.

I need new goals
I need a new focus
I need a new direction

The new year is just a mere few weeks away, I don't want to go into the new year like this. There probably isn't enough time to change anything now, but at least I need to know that I won't be like this for too long. A new year, a new life?

Inspired by Joe

Before this, I was: Contemplating my life
Currently listening to: The Doors - The End
Currently feeling: Bored, emo, sad, frustrated, unsatisfied, melancholy

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Ain't much to talk about...

Just a short one just so to confirm Joe that this blog is indeed alive, barely...

Had been bloody busy for the last several days, almost everyday at the shop in Mid Valley and every weekend is somewhere in Klang Valley for the roadshow promotion. Money wasn't really something I have in abundance at the moment, it's not like I ever had money in abundance before anyway, but I'll have some extras for books, or music or some fun. budget had been very tight this few months, I think I need to find a proper job soon. I supposed myself is to be blamed for the fact that I'm still doing part times only, I had never really been actively seeking jobs the last few months, send out a few applications, went to one interview and that's it. Been filtering and choosy about the jobs I'm applying too, only applying for the jobs that I like and is related to me. Should I start branching out to other industries? Or do something entirely unrelated to what I was trained? Sales and marketing maybe? This is probably the easiest job to find out there, everybody is looking for a salesman.


Before this, I was: Scheduling this weekend's roadshow staff
Currently listening to: Pete Teo - Jesselton Tonight
Currently feeling: Emo, tired, confused

Friday, December 02, 2005

Langkawi, and other stuff

Been quite some time since the last post, had been very very busy for the last few weeks. Much had happened since; Langkawi, mad work, bad relationship, party.

I was at Langkawi few weeks back with my family, and when I say family, it includes my 3 aunts, 2 uncles, my grandfather and a hoard of cousins, all together 17 people. We stayed at the apartment serviced by Leisure Holidays Berhad at the north-east side of the island, rather secluded and hidden unless you know how to get there. The place wasn't that big, a modest 2 room unit with all the comforts of home. We booked 2 units and somehow managed to squeeze all 17 people inside comfortably, probably broken a record somewhere. Another record breaking feat performed when we're there is the ability for us to squeeze ALL 17 of us into ONE Toyota Hi-Ace van, luckily there are a few children and most of the adults are rather on the wiry side, except for me of course, but I'm sitting in front so there's no squeezing at all.

Most of the tourist spots in Langkawi are rather far apart, and the roads wasn't exactly perfect and the road signs are like every other road sign in Malaysia; confusing. So going anywhere in Langkawi is rather problematic, and with 17 people tagging along everywhere is downright disaster. It takes a full 5 minutes just to climb into the car and position themselves comfortably, and another 5 to climb out. The van itself also wasn't in her best condition, the van had probably been driven a thousand times and the engine is just around the corner from the scrapyard.

The last time I'm in Langkawi was with friends more than a year back, spent more time at the beach and in the sea than anywhere else. We barely went to any of the tourist spots at all, just the Underwater World and a few other free entrance places and then left soon. But this time, I'm with the family with old people and kids, beach bumming and bar hopping wasn't exactly what they have in mind. The very first place we visited was the old Mahsuri Tomb, that doesn't very old now. They, whoever they are, had build the place up to look more like any other generic tourist spot than a historical location, complete with a air-conditioned museum and gift shops. It's probably a good idea to beautify the place a little to make it more tourist friendly, but I personally think a historical site should remain a historical site image and not look like a bloody shopping mall, albeit one with an ancient tomb in it. The next spot we visit is supposed to be Pantai Pasir Hitam, or Black Sand Beach. But we got lost and ended up at Tanjung Rhu beach instead, so we got off the van and walked around abit, looking around and let the kids play around awhile before we're forced to climb back into the van because the weather doesn't look very friendly. That night, we went down to the jetty and walked around near the huge eagle statue that is now the symbol of the island.

The next morning we went to Telaga Tujuh, or the Seven Wells waterfall, basically its just like any other waterfall anywhere else, unless you're willing to climb up the god-knows-how-far I-think-it-looked-too-step-for-comfort stairs to see the actual seven wells. Apparently, the top of the waterfall is actually a lake that looked like seven interlinked wells, or at least thats what the tourist brochures said, never really bothered to go look for myself. The next place we went was probably the highlight of the trip, for some of us that is; the Underwater World. Most of the adults, well actually all the adults are reluctant to go inside, in the end, there's only me, my sister, my aunt and the children that goes in. In the beginning, I was also reluctant to go because the entrance fee is RM28, and since I've already been in there before, I decided to give this place a skip. But after looking at the tourist brochures and the pictures of the interior displayed at the entrance, and noticing that the place had been renovated and is alot bigger than last time, I decided to join the children and go in. The new wing now housed a semi-outdoor area with swans and flamingos and a huge anaconda, slightly further in is the brand spanking new arctic section with penguins and seals, of which we spend the most time gawking at the penguins dive bombing into the water. A new addition to the place is the 3D theater show that wasn't really that interesting at all, although the seats was very welcoming after walking around the place.

The last place we visited was Galeri Perdana, or Perdana Gallery, displaying the various gifts and items owned by our previous prime minister; Tun Dr. Mahathir. It displays everything from the gifts from various foreign visits and visitors from foreign countries to the the potraits presented to him by famous artists around the world to even his and his wife's doctorate certificates he got years ago. That's all the places we visited, and of course no trip to Langkawi would be complete without a visit to our favorite duty free shopping place; Teow Soon Huat. Bought loads of chocolates and liquors, which I probably cost more than anything else we spend at the trip. My only encounter with the sea was dipping my feet in the sea water for a few short seconds when we walked to the beach of the resort next door to our apartment.

That's pretty much all I did in Langkawi, which is rather boring to be frank. Probably at my age, anything you do with your family won't be much interesting compared to what we did when we're with friends.

The very next morning after we got back to KL, I've to work at the promotion, this time at the Homedec '05 exhibition in Mid Valley for 3 days straight, followed by the same roadshow at different locations at the weekend and another 3 days straight at the CD shop in Mid Valley; 8 days straight working non stop from day to night. Today is actually the only day I'm free and is able to actually rest since I got back from Langkawi, I just got back last week and I felt like I need another vacation soon.

Had a slight fallout with my dad last week, wasn't really serious, I'm not even sure what the hell happened. But then again, the old man is known for his bad temper, I think I'll just be a good boy and just stay low for a few days for things to cool and pretend nothing happened. It worked before, will probably work again this time. My relationship with my dad was never really a perfect father-son relationship, I never really understand what he wants and he is just, well, being him.

Today was Nelsen's birthday party, not his actual birthday, which is a few days away, and it wasn't really a party at all, but just sort of a get together with a few friends and had dinner. Had a good laugh with them when we reminiscense the last time we're at Langkawi and of course college times. It was a pretty nice break from the pressures I've to face for the last several days, a time where we can just hang out and chill and talk cock and forget about work, even if its just a few short hours.

Before this, I was: Just got back from Nelsen's party
Currently listening to: Pete Teo - Arms of Marianne
Currently feeling: Bored, emo, sleepy