Let's talk about love...

Jokeless post...

It's raining heavily outside, been raining like this half the day already. I always feel kinda blue during rainy days, and today was no difference, if not blur-er than usual.

You know sometimes when you felt like calling someone you loved to chat with them, feeling really excited and then the person you called told you something you don't want to hear like, "I'm busy now, call back some other time", or "Stop calling me!", or in my case, she telling me "I think I liked someone else", or something along that line. I felt like my heart got ripped out from me and thrown into the deepest abyss.

You see, I've been trying to get to this girl for quite some time already, she's actually an old school friend of mine, knew her for a very long time already, but we lost contact and only recently we met again. Don't ask me how I become to lking her, I wouldn't have the answers for that, I guess it just happens. But the problem is, I liked her, and she doesn't know it.

Most recently, she went to another state up North for a holiday trip, to meet a friend. Little did I know is that she's going to meet a guy friend she met in some forum. She came back today, and told me that she kinad liked that guy, only after meeting him for the first time during the holiday trip.

I always wonder about this thing called 'love at first sight'. Do you agree with it? It happened to me before, me falling in love with someone else and never the vice-versa. Although I've been the 'victim' of love at first sight before, twice. The one I loved liking someone else that they meet at first sight, this would be the third time. I wouldn't be surprised though, I do admit I looked like a land whale. But that's another topic...

This particular person I loved, She wasn't any superb beauty, or a gorgeous chick, she's just normal... normal enough to be attractive and yet not going overboard. But that's another topic too...

I'm now fighting with myself whether to continue this one-sided relationship with her. Hell, I don't think its a relationship at all. This feeling more likely, thias feeling of loving someone with being loved back. I've been treating really nice eversince I met her again recently, so nice it borders to stupidity, as pointed by some of my friends. Is it nice to drive halfway around town to send someone somewhere, and driving back halfway around town sending someone back home, with a gap of a few hours doing nothing? Or is it stupidity?

Loving someone with out being loved back wasn't something new to me, has been happening to me since high school. I'm pobably immune to heart breaks since it has been broken countless times since high school. Lost count to how many girls that I've liked and loved but without response.

What am I to do now? I've been asked this question before, and my answer remains the same. I'll still like and love her as if she's mine, trying to win her back through what I have. That is, if I do decide to continue this 'relationship' with her...